Much of what causes problems for individuals is a lack of clear understanding about themselves and the world. Many people have a vision of themselves that chafes with reality which can lead to entitlement. This is then further amplified by inflexibility and resentment.
For young people, they feel like the world should be fair, and are slowly realizing it is not. They wrongly conclude that if they are treated unfairly then they shouldn't bother trying. Or, they use this as a reason to treat others poorly. Parents often see, from their perspective, their child's potential and how they are failing to reach it. They can feel fear for their child's future, which leads to a desire to control. They may also be bitter because they feel their children are ungrateful for everything they have sacrificed on their child's behalf and are thus "owed" something in return.
It is my aim to help liberate children and their parents from these fixed perspectives. Parents can have a clarified vision of their role, without needing a specific outcome for their child. Young adults can realize that suffering and injustice are actually where purpose and meaning are found. If one realizes we are all suffering, then one can find purpose in maintaining, or even improving upon the society in which we live by helping those around them. This service to others, which takes on innumerable forms, gives meaning to life.
Coaching Process
Teens & Young Adults
Learn client narrative. Negative and positive experiences that lead to self-image.
Identify sources of anger and resentment towards self, family, and society.
Challenge black and white thinking.
Challenge notions of fairness and visions of how the world "ought to be".
Help resolve these issues by guiding the client through a process of critical thinking that rewrites their personal narrative changing their position from victim to empowered free agent.
Redefine the client's role in life from one of consumer of pleasures and seeker of happiness to one of action and purpose.
Parents
Identify fears and controls.
What are your expectations? What do you actually have a right to influence as your child grows up?
Understanding the arch of vulnerability, and dependence as a child to independence, and responsibility as an adult.
Examine your ideas of "success" for your child.
What are the minimum requirements that must be met by your child to be independent?
How to offer options and choices, rather than leveraging influence and lecturing.
Learn and practice letting go of a false sense of ownership over your child's life, thus, setting yourself free from fear and guilt.
Learn more to find out of ReaLife Coaching is the right fit your family. Click the link below.